The Next Step

It’s been a challenge to start posting regularly again, there are the stresses and strains and wants and needs of life calling and pulling in different directions. But there’s also a hesitancy in me, that has nothing to do with outside influences, which is all my own.

I feel it’s in part down to the break I took from working. I’ve spent the last year focusing on looking after myself and it can be an isolating experience at times as there is a self-involvement that needs to take place in order to admit that; ‘Hey, I’m sick, I need to go easy on myself a bit!’

As well though, and this is coming up for me now because I’m getting back to work and I’m wondering; am I ready to commit to working for other people now? Will I wait another week or do I just send out the emails today? But on top of all these questions is the knowledge that I don’t want to work in the same way I was working before my break. This doesn’t apply to stylistically or creatively really. For me they grow and change organically. I’m talking more about attitude, more about how I approach the doing, the strategising. I was ‘working’ a lot and not getting a lot of work done. Early mornings, late nights and a lot of creative blocks to the point where I think my drawings look pained in themselves, constipated characters.

So here I am again, about to set out to work for the company in England, the agent who wants that finished book, the cool independent project that speaks to my soul, and the little voice in my head that says 5 more minutes, 5 more minutes. And I look at these sketches and doodles and I try to remember to treasure the freedom, the invention, and the brave individual expression that they can represent.

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